


raw humanity

by honeyteeth



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Crushes, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Scars, ed isnt shy at All about other people seeing the scars he picked up from fights, general touching, greed is a little flustered but not too much, it's just tender ig, mentions of ling but he's fucking Sleepy so he wont come out, really nice Soft Conversations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-10-02 18:48:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17269118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/honeyteeth/pseuds/honeyteeth
Summary: Touchstarved, scared out of his wits, and dripping wet, Ed finds himself alone with Greed while Heinkel and Darius are out gathering supplies. During this fateful night, he realizes just how human the both of them are-- but at the same time, just how divine.





	raw humanity

**Author's Note:**

> im feelin,,,,,,, ghhg,,, so i jusgt wanna write somethin nice,,, anyway i am such a little sucker for gentle and intimate situations!!! not sexually, even though intimacy is usually sexual, but like,,,, really little gestures that show some form of love,,,, ,, u feel that?

There was a collective hush in the vast grove. Apart from the occasional chirp of a bird or scampering of a squirrel, Ed was the only one making noise as he crashed through the brush and stepped heavily on twigs. 

 

Firewood. That was all he needed, but apparently, it was right next to impossible to hunt down plausible candidates. The forest floor was damp from a heavy rain two days ago, and the humidity and heavy dark clouds blocking out the sun didn’t help with the drying process. In the hour that he had been gone, he had only managed to find a handful of not completely rotted, soaking twigs and branches. This sucked. 

 

As he sought out wood, he let his mind drift aimlessly. Occasionally, it would land on Winry and Pinako and how they were doing, if they were safe, if they were happy. Then, it would fall on Lan Fan, and whether or not she was finding a good mechanic to replace the arm that she had taken herself. It bounced back from Izumi to Al then Sig, then to Roy and Riza, just because, during times like these, even Mustang deserved to have someone worry about him. Of course, his wandering mind would always come back to his own little party, since he  _ always _ had to worry about them. But usually in a bad way. 

 

He wondered if Heinkel and Darius were managing to pitch the tents, or if Ling was safe all cooped up in Greed’s body, or if Greed had found another frog and was trying to capture it as he had earlier in the morning. “It’s  _ mine, _ ” he had declared triumphantly when he finally clasped two calloused hands around the slippery creature’s body. It was gone by the time he made it back to camp. 

 

Then, for the umpteenth time in the span of fifteen minutes, Ed’s oversized, stark white coat snagged on a particularly small sapling, sending him stumbling over his feet. However, this time around, he was not able to recover and lost his footing. A sharp yell pierced the deafening silence, breaking the spell that seemed to be on the forest as the world began to turn again, animals rustling about and the breeze whispering secrets into any listener’s ears. However, Ed wasn’t able to hear these supposedly mystical secrets that the world around him oh so generously offered; his upper half, including his head, was completely submerged in icy water. A shiver coursed through his body, goosebumps raising just as firmly as the hair on his neck and arms as he tore himself out of the frigid river, gasping. 

 

Torso up, he was soaked to the bone. 

 

Ed let out a groan, pawing at his dripping shirt as he peeled the soggy coat from his shoulders. Firewood or not, he was going back to the camp-- he was too exhausted to deal with the absolute bullshit mother nature was shoving at his unfortunate body. Hey, at least some of the gloomy dark clouds were dissipating. Maybe that’d dry him off a little bit.

 

As the sun set, the sky was painted with peaches and cream, flashes of apricot and lilac pushing their way into the scene as well. Lilac was a nice color, Ed thought. Purple, kind of like Greed’s eyes, in fact, only lighter. However, no color in the millions of sunsets that had occurred in the world could ever even  _ compare  _ to the rich wine that Greed carried in his irises. Of course, it wasn’t just the color; his eyes had a certain spark to them, a certain flame that made them blaze like an inferno. Maybe it was his determination or his blatant cockiness. Or perhaps it was his confidence-- in both himself and others (though he’d never dare admit how much he really cared)-- that truly gave his eyes the strength and power of a god-- of a monster. 

 

Ed blinked. Was he really just thinking about that homunculus’ eyes? Right in the middle of his trek back to the camp, when he could have thought about  _ literally  _ anything else? Of all of the things that he could possibly imagine, of all of the things that swarmed inside of his brain endlessly like gnats in the summertime,  _ Greed’s eyes  _ were what Ed was hooked on? Involuntarily, the Amestrian groaned and pinched his cold, wet fingers to the bridge of his equally as cold and wet nose. He’d just get back to camp and dry off; then he could go to bed and forget about every embarrassing thought that he had during his failed firewood expedition.

 

The sun set at last and a chill hovered in the air that did not help with Ed’s whole “soaking wet waist up” situation whatsoever. He shivered, teeth clacking together as he trudged on, shuffling his feet and making what he could only assume was a sour, grumpy face. At least he was almost back. 

 

The closer to the campsite he got, the more Ed discovered that the scent of ash and soot was strong in the air. As he rounded a few twisted, knotty old trees, he discovered the source. Roaring up from a hand-dug pit, a bonfire sat, glowing harsh gold and thick crimson, licks of teal creeping up from the very bottom of the pit and curling in the fire’s stomach. Even from where he was standing, the alchemist could  _ feel  _ the heat radiating off of it. 

 

Tending to it was none other than Greed. Ling, maybe? No, this was defi…..nitely…. Maybe not? There was no way of knowing; whoever it was, he wasn’t making any sort of expression to give away his current identity. 

 

“Ling…?” A mere whisper, barely loud enough to be heard. The figure, who was currently poking at the flames, looked up. Ed couldn’t make out the color of his eyes in the glare of the fire. However, from the know-it-all, shit-eating smirk that was curling onto an otherwise smooth and seemingly innocent face, the teenager knew who it was in an instant. 

 

“How many times do I have to tell you, short stack? It’s pronounced  _ Greed.  _ Does it really take that much work to remember your leader’s name?” He scoffed, tossing the stick he was using to poke at the fire into the crackling flames, sending it up into mere cinders. 

 

“Yeah, it  _ does  _ take that much work-- at least when you don’t care enough,” Ed grumbled, shoving still-drippy hands into now-wet pockets. 

 

“Oh shut up, pipsqueak,” there was just enough affection in his voice to make it sound like a pet name. “you’re just upset because you’re followin’  _ me  _ now. I own you, and you’re bitter about th-- hey, what the fuck happened to you?” 

 

Greed stood and walked over to where the admittedly shorter teen was standing, hands on hips, wine eyes shining in the darkness. 

 

“Shit, you’re soaked through, huh?” An Ouroboros-tattooed hand raised to rest on sopping golden hair, feeling its way down a damp face until it landed on a drenched shoulder. Slowly, it continued to make its way down through patting motions. It shouldn’t have sent thrills racing up and down Ed’s spine, shouldn’t have given him a little rush every time rough hands made contact with his quavering, clammy frame. This was merely a friendly action, simply Greed checking up on the smaller teen, almost as if the bastard was making sure he wasn’t injured. “This goes all the way down to your waist, idiot, how’d it happen?” 

 

“...It’s none of your business,” Ed managed to choke out, shoving the homunculus’-- technically Ling’s-- dumb little grabby hands away. Eyes half-lidded, mouth drawn into a tight, expressionless line and eyebrows lifted, Greed shrugged philosophically and turned his head away, sauntering back to the fire. However, instead of sitting down, he threw another cluster of kindling onto it before turning to Ed. 

 

“At least try and dry off by the fire, ‘kay? Can’t have you catchin’ a cold or nothin’.” He arched his back, stretching, rolling his shoulders and neck 'til they popped with a satisfying crack. ”Anyway, I’ll be back. Heinkel and Darius went off to look for somethin’ to eat and gather more supplies, ‘n I thought I’d just catch up to them and bother them a little. It’s boring out here.” 

 

With that, Ed was watching the homunculus stroll away, hands tucked firmly into the pockets of his black pants, dark trench coat fluttering in the occasional breeze, jet-black hair bobbing as he walked with the usual bounce in his step. Huh. He had never really noticed his hair before, or how unbelievably  _ dark  _ it was, just the pure absence of color. It glinted in the pale light of the moon, and it was mesmerizing, captivating. 

 

Ed quickly averted his eyes, biting hard at his lower lip, trying to fill his head with thoughts of his mechanic, instead, as he slowly shuffled to the fire and eased down onto one of the many large logs surrounding the pit with a deep sigh. Yeah, this’d help. Winry, despite being his best friend, was still a girl, one with nice blue eyes and soft blonde hair. She was very pretty, Ed decided, but at the same time tough enough to withstand any difficulties that life threw at her. Definitely someone to look up to, she was a hard worker who somehow, despite everything, managed to stay pure of heart. A smile tugged at the corner of the alchemist’s lips; he was really proud of her. Her and her good, healing hands, the ones that gave him his leg and arm and  _ didn’t  _ shoot even when she had the chance and sometimes grew massive black claws as a carbon shield crept its way up bony yet powerful fingers, slicking over and glimmering dangerously, muscles rippling under solid obsidian armo--

 

Wait.

 

Frustrated, exhausted, and  _ still  _ dripping wet, Ed buried his face in the palms of his hands. This was awful. He didn’t even like guys, because he was straight! He liked girls and nothing but girls. Girls, girls, girls, he urged himself to believe stubbornly. 

 

He could brood on this all night. Let his mind wallow in uncomfortably soft thoughts about his friend (was Greed his friend? Surely he had to be at this point). Think about every handsome quality about that sly fox and then groan about it five seconds later, unsure of how he really, actually felt about the homunculus. He  _ could,  _ really. He had the power; he was very good at worrying. 

 

However, right now was not the time. Right now, all the Amestrian cared about was getting warm. So, he slowly rose from where he sat, trudging over to one of their supply cases. It was Heinkel’s backpack, blue and falling apart, little holes revealing bits of the contents inside. Ed reached in and grasped a thick, heavy rope and pulled until he held the length of it in his hands. He stood again, going to the nearest tree. Clapping his hands together, he pressed into the earth below his feet to make a sort of makeshift stool so that he could tie the rope around the trunk from a reasonable height. He did the same to a particularly tall shrub. Satisfied with his work, he began working the buttons loose on his shirt, slowly letting the fabric fall down his toned shoulders as he lowered. Last button loose, shirt completely bunched up to the crease of his elbows, he shucked the dripping cotton material off and leaned up on his tippy toes to toss it clumsily over the now taut makeshift clothesline. He shifted it, making sure it was at least a little even so that it would dry properly, before promptly strolling back to the bonfire.

 

Ed stretched, the exhaustion from the day suddenly rushing back to him, hitting him hard in the gut like a solid punch. Lazily, he pulled his own pack from the pile of supplies, digging around until he found a thick, puffy sleeping bag. This had been his only comfort for the past few weeks, he thought as he unrolled it onto the ground below. He sighed deeply, crumpling like origami under the weight that hung heavy on his shoulders, laying flat on his stomach and bringing his arms up to cross under his head so that he could rest his cheek on them. 

 

He allowed himself to breathe. 

 

The fire was nice and cozy, and he could feel his skin and hair drying off in its embrace. He nuzzled into his arms, feeling his eyelids grow heavy. While drifting in and out of consciousness, if he let his mind go blank, he could almost imagine that the softness of his sleeping bag and the warmth of the fire was human. That the tendrils of smoke were wisps of hair and the glowing cinders were whispers and soft eyes and little giggles of hope and affirmations. Even if it was fake, even if he had to reach into the furthest corners of his mind, he could just pretend that just for a moment, someone was there to offer him the physical affection that he yearned for. 

 

Strange, Ed chuckled to himself; he would never have admitted to ever want any sort of touch, any sort of contact. But now, when he’s all alone and it’s cold and he’s still a bit damp and he’s in this vast expanse of fucking  _ woods--  _ he just wants something. Someone. Wanted to talk for hours about nothing, wanted to be told shitty jokes and to maybe have a brush to get the annoying tangles out of his messy hair-- even better, to have someone  _ else  _ get the annoying tangles out of his messy hair _ for _ him. He missed Al and Winry and Pinako and Ling, too, as weird as it sounded. Heinkel, Darius, and Greed were his friends, too, and though he was with them constantly, and would see them all again tonight, that didn’t stop him from missing them, even when they were with him.

 

Pitiful. The Fullmetal Alchemist wanting some love? Gross. Ed groaned, burying his face in the nook of his arms, deciding that he was just tired, forcing himself to ignore the fact that all of the feelings of touch and connection that he had oh so hungrily yearned for had only bubbled to the surface of his heart when he thought about one specific person. It was bullshit, really; his heart had no right to be this set on someone that he really ought to hate. 

 

Oh well-- he couldn’t control his feelings, but he sure as hell could ignore the _shit_ outta them and sleep on them until they hopefully dissolved. It was the Edward Elric Way. 

 

Sleepy from heat pouring over the tense muscles of his back, he let his eyes flutter closed, feeling the most gentle and delicate form of sleep slowly start to envelop him. He was tiptoeing on the edge of slumber when the loud crunch of sticks being broken and leaves rustling carelessly ripped him away from his almost-calm. Alert instantly, he clapped his palms together, pressing down on his automail and glaring out into the distance while blue electricity danced on the steel, the light partially blinding him for a moment. As the light died down, and a sharp, dangerous blade glinted on his right arm, Ed’s vision cleared, and he was less than thrilled to see a familiar silhouette standing a few feet away from the bonfire, hands raised in mock defensiveness, face indifferent. 

 

“Hey, dickhole, watch where you point that thing. Almost had me thinkin’ you were gonna attack me!” Greed’s familiar, gruff voice sliced through the silence that had followed Ed’s initial panic. 

 

“Didn’t know it was you,” He grumbled, transmuting his arm back to normal again before laying back down, shoulders somehow even tenser than before. “Although, I’m still thinking of attacking you.” 

 

“Don’t be nasty when I didn’t even do anythin’.” He heard shuffling behind him and a soft sigh as Greed sunk to the ground, resting on one of the many logs that surrounded the pit. “Met up with Heinkel and Darius, ‘n they said they were gonna take a little break. I almost joined ‘em, but they kicked me out of the group. Since they were just gatherin’ supplies, I thought it’d be nice to join them and keep ‘em company but  _ noooo,  _ something about how they had to discuss some matters that didn’t concern me.” From behind, Ed heard a huff. He could only imagine that Greed had his arms crossed, shoulders raised and lips poised in a childish pout as he spoke sourly of the two men. 

 

“Why does that bother you so much?” 

 

“Because  _ everything  _ concerns me! I want it all, and it should be clear that information and private conversations classify as… Well, as ‘it all!’” The homunculus groaned loudly. Ed only rolled his eyes, turning to face the fire once more, cheek smushed up against his arm. Despite his loud complaining and immature attitude, Greed was still someone to talk to, Ed thought. And he was kinda funny, even if he didn’t know it. Not to mention handsome, but Ed would never let himself admit that. 

 

“It’s probably something gushy, anyway. You wouldn’t want to hear it.” Ed murmured, wondering if Greed could even hear him.

 

“Whadd’ya mean by gushy?” Ah, so he could. 

 

“Haven’t you ever seen them talking? Late at night when they think nobody else is around, that is. They’re real close.” 

 

“Wait,  _ what?  _ Are you trying to say that gorilla-man and the king of the jungle have a thing?” 

 

“Yeah! You haven’t noticed? When they think that nobody’s around to see they’ll like… Hold hands and shit. Once I even saw Heinkel give Darius a little peck on the corner of his mouth, and then they both laughed about how stupid everything was.” Ed paused for a moment, biting his lip. Lucky bastards, managing to find someone to love and care about during this time. He thought he did with Winry, but his stupid feelings were directed elsewhere. 

 

“Yuck. How could they kiss when they have to run from literal fucking monsters almost every day?” Greed made a disgusted noise, causing Ed to, once again, roll his eyes.

 

“I don’t think it’s that gross. It’s kinda sweet, actually,” He said before he could stop himself. “I mean, it’s like having a best friend except… Closer, softer, a bit more loving. And I think it must be nice to have someone look out for and care for you like that.” 

 

“Oh yeah?” The homunculus’ tone had changed. It was a little quieter, a little more cautious. 

 

“Yeah.”

 

Silence fell between them, awkward and heavy and very unwelcome. Ed didn’t really know what to say, and it seemed that the other boy didn’t, either. So they continued to sit in the absolute quiet that was the forest at night, nothing but the occasional pop and sizzle that arose from the bonfire to fill the void. A few times, Ed had opened his mouth, but quickly closed it, deciding that the thought was too insignificant to voice.

 

“Think they’ll get married when this is over?” Greed finally asked, though his regularly loud and rough tone had turned into something much more breakable, much more quiet.

 

“I do,” Ed responded, surprised that his voice was equally as toned down. 

 

“So do I. Maybe we’ll be invited,” A chuckle. 

 

“And do what? Be flower boys?” 

 

“No way! I’d be the best man.” Soft pause, barely noticeable shift in weight, sigh of contentedness. 

 

“And what role would  _ I  _ play at our fantasy wedding for our two chimera pals?” Ed couldn’t keep himself from giggling gently as he spoke. 

 

“You can be the maid of honor.” 

 

“Hey!”

 

“You’d look pretty cute in a dress, yeah?” 

 

“Greed cut that out!” 

 

“Cute floral print, maybe cut to your knees. Ooh, and lace trimmings! To match the big gaudy bow that you’ll have tied in your hair and the gloves that’ll be on your tiny dainty fingers!” 

 

“Shut  _ up! _ ” Ed hefted himself up and pried off a heavy boot, promptly chucking it at Greed, who was beginning to chuckle a little more. By the time he had thrown the second, both of them were completely gone, heads thrown back and doubled over, shoulders shaking with loud, chaotic laughs and ugly snorts. Ed wondered if Greed had always looked so beautiful when he laughed, what with the crinkles around his squeezed-shut eyes and on the bridge of his nose, and the way his mouth was just wide open and how he simply tossed back his head without a single care. 

 

At last, the giggles and chuckles died down, leaving the two of them with loose grins and flushed cheeks. Nothing about the position they were in or the conversation they had just had was even remotely humorous, not one bit. But that was the thing with tragic situations, wasn’t it? They brought upon the reality of death, made everyone realize just how truly mortal they were. And what was more mortal than laughing-- right in the ugly, looming face of danger?

 

It almost made Ed guilty, in fact. As he rolled over to lay on his stomach again, he thought of the thousands of people who, right now, were paralyzed with fear. Thought of his brother and his best friend and how  _ worried  _ he was about them; he even thought of Scar and Mei Chang and Yoki. They were probably working hard to form plans, preparing to fight, losing sleep because of the anxiety clawing away at the insides of their skulls. But here he was, still giddy and warm from recent laughter, tummy full of butterflies as he sat with the person that he loved (though it took him ages to finally succumb to the staggering feelings). While he was smiling, they were suffering. 

 

“Hey, you!” 

 

A solid  _ thwunk  _ to the back of Ed’s head that left it throbbing dully with pain snapped him back into consciousness. He rubbed the spot where the object, a rock, had hit, cursing under his breath. 

 

“What was that for, asshole?” Ed griped, turning his head to face Greed, who wasn’t smirking like he had expected him to be. No, his face was drawn tight, eyebrows subtly knit. An emotion that the alchemist couldn’t read was glazed over in his wine-purple eyes. Could that be concern, possibly? 

 

“Stop doing that,” Greed’s voice, once again, was much less boisterous than usual. 

 

“Doing  _ what?”  _

 

“Brooding.” 

 

Ed fell silent, turning back around, unsure of what to do with the blush creeping onto the apples of his cheeks. 

 

“You do this  _ all the time,”  _ Greed, apparently, wasn’t finished talking. Behind him, Ed heard rustling, the near-silent grunt of someone standing up, the shuffling of shoes on dirt and rock. He felt the presence of the homunculus as he sat down on the log closest to him, felt those deep eyes boring holes into bare shoulder blades and exposed flesh. “Why don’t you learn to think for yourself for a change? You’re allowed to be selfish. To be  _ greedy. _ ” 

 

“I  _ am  _ selfish. I don’t do enough, and these people deserve help that I can give, but I’m just sitting around! That’s selfish if I’ve ever heard of it.” 

 

“But right now you can’t do jack shit! You’re stuck, whether you like it or not, in the woods. We’re making progress, and yeah, I know, it’s pretty slow but we’re still doin’ shit.  _ You’re  _ still doin’ shit. You’re makin’ a conscious effort to help people you don’t even know!” 

 

“But I need to give them more!” Ed’s voice rose slightly, but he didn’t change positions. Neither did Greed, and the alchemist could feel his gaze grow more searing by the minute. “They  _ deserve more! _ ” He grits his teeth, trying to restrain himself. 

 

“Then what?” 

 

The question is simple and given softly. It holds no anger, no frustration, no passive-aggressiveness, no sarcasm. 

 

“Wh… Huh?” Ed’s mind draws a blank, the fury in his throat melting away, dissolving. 

 

“When you’ve given them everything and you have nothing left to give, nothing for yourself. Then what, Ed?” Greed said slowly. For some reason, the way he spoke the alchemist’s name-- with such gentleness and care-- caused a deep sadness to stir within the pits of his gut. 

 

“Well, I… I’m not sure.” He fell silent for a moment, before shaking his head, eyebrows knit together in anger and fear and pain and everything he had been feeling but was too scared to really say that he had. “But it doesn’t matter! If I give up everything for those people, the innocent ones that I can save, then so be it! I don’t even care. Everyone out there has suffered enough, I can take a little more!” 

 

“Then what about these?” Ed was thrown back with the weight of the voice asking the question. It was sad, worried, hurt, even. 

 

Ed turned to look over his shoulder just in time to see Greed slowly slipping off of the log onto his knees, coming to rest directly next to the shorter boy, gazing solemnly across his frame. “Because from where I’m sitting, it kinda looks like you’ve taken a little more than enough already.” Greed finished in that pained whisper, extending a cautious and slow hand. He stopped himself though. 

 

“Those are nothing but scars. We all get them when we fight.” Ed murmured, returning to his previous resting position. 

 

“But your back is littered in ‘em,  pipsqueak. Not only that, but I can see the tenseness in your muscles and the way that you almost flinched when I sat down.” He showed no sign of mockery, no sign of sarcasm. Slowly, he lowered himself so that he was lying next to Ed, resting on his side with his elbow propped up, head cupped in his hand.

 

“It doesn’t matter. So what if I’m a little ugly and roughed up?” 

 

“It means you’ve been hurt a lot, idiot.” 

 

“Ok, and? So has everyone else.” 

 

“Well,  yeah, but…” The sentence died in the homunculus’ throat, voice breaking clumsily. 

 

The two sat very still, too afraid of emotions and the weight of the world and the concept of hurt to even breathe. 

 

“Can I touch you?” Greed was the one to break the silence, the words falling carefully, slowly, gently from his lips. Ed only nodded; maybe a quiet “yeah” escaped his clamped mouth, but he doubted it. However, it was all the confirmation that Greed needed. 

 

So he touched Ed.

 

Chills crept down the alchemist’s back as Greed pressed a finger to his back, gliding it carefully over to a patch of rough, scarred skin. He ran the pad of his thumb it, working delicately as to not injure to the alchemist’s back in any way. 

 

Carefully, gently, tenderly, Greed traced every single scar on Ed’s back. Pressed the calloused, warm palm of his hand to his tired shoulder, brushed knuckles over his spine. It was nice-- the contact. Tangible, grounding. It reminded the alchemist that no, he wasn’t alone right now. He wasn’t in an ideal location so to speak, but he was at least with someone that he really  _ did  _ care about, and who, apparently, cared about him, at least enough to touch him in such a kind and worrisome way. He melted every time the homunculus would mumble something, even if it meant not quite hearing or understanding what he had said. 

 

“Did’ja hear me?” Greed’s voice pierced through the trance Ed was in. 

 

“What? Oh. No, sorry, can you say it again?” A muttered response. 

 

“Where’d you get this one? Er, if it’s cool to ask, that is,” Greed’s finger was pressed right in the middle of Ed’s back, on top of a spot that the alchemist would not soon forget. 

 

“Oh. That.” He inhaled, exhaling slowly as the homunculus continued to circle his thumb on the spot absentmindedly. “Yeah, uh, I actually got it fighting Kimblee. He blew up a building, I came down with it. And then th--ugh-- there was a pole lodged right where that scar is.” Ed shuttered at the memory. 

 

“Like-- like pole as in a metal  _ beam?”  _ Greed gawked. 

 

“Yeah, yeah, exactly. I uh, I used alchemy to cut the thing in half, then those two-- Heinkel and Darius-- pulled it out for me and I sealed the wound back up again. They actually had a philosopher’s stone on ‘em, so that definitely helped a lot more than regular alchemy. It was fucking painful as shit.” 

 

“Yeah, I’d think so!  _ Fuck,  _ Edward, you’re still alive after all of that? How badass are you?” Greed let out a surprised bark of a laugh, and Ed felt himself smile softly at the compliment (and use of his  _ full  _ name!)

 

Greed continued, seeming to trace every muscle and bruise, every dip and curve, every rough patch of flesh. It was almost like he was trying to fix them, to magically heal them away, sometimes asking for different stories from different wounds, which Ed was happy to give. It gave him something to distract himself from worrying, and filled him with comfort he knew he didn’t deserve.

 

Silence, again. But this time, it wasn’t awkward. There was simply no need for further conversation; it was comfortable and familiar, quite pleasant, really. 

 

“Your bones are tired and your hair is a complete disaster.” Greed murmured suddenly. He barely spoke above a whisper, voice quivering ever so slightly. He shifted his weight so that he was now standing on his knees, before swinging one of his legs over the smaller boy and lowering himself so he was now straddling the small of Ed’s back. “You okay down there?” He asked, much softer than Ed knew he was capable of. 

 

“Huh? Oh, yeah, actually. That um… That feels nice,” Ed replied timidly. He felt like his face was glowing in the dark, just as bright and red and hot as the fire next to him. 

 

Greed ran his thumbs up either side of Ed’s spine, stopping at his shoulders. From there, the alchemist felt nimble hands working at the ribbon around his braid, before soft fingers brushed it loose, straightening it, carefully pulling the knots loose. From his peripheral vision, he could see the gold of his hair as it spilled over his upper back and neck. 

 

“It’s really soft once you brush it through,” Greed commented idly, reaching forward and starting at the scalp, running down until the thick locks fell from the spaces between his fingertips. Ed closed his eyes, leaning into every touch, soaking up every word, letting the homunculus’ hands roam across his frame, sometimes drawing little shapes into the crevices and wiping thumbs over scar tissue as Greed expertly mapped out his body in ways that, once again, Ed had no idea he was capable of. 

 

He felt Greed slowly start to gather bunches of Ed’s hair and lay them out into three pieces along his back before slowly beginning to loop them around each other, braiding the golden locks with nimble mobility. Every once in a while, he’d accidentally tug at one of the strands, but would then quickly apologize, even going as far as to lay a comforting hand over the affected area. At last, he was tying a little bow using the white ribbon before setting the finished braid back down. Ed shuttered, a little bit embarrassed about the goosebumps that had risen due to the attention. 

 

The stillness that followed was filled with sudden tension. A certain thickness in the air, the sudden drop of a decision. Suddenly, without any warning, it was feather light again. Ed felt Greed move his thick, braided hair carefully to the side. Moments later, the hairs on the back of his neck pricked up as he felt warm breath on his skin, and finally, a set of lips. It lasted a mere split second, and the homunculus was sitting up straight again just as fast as he had been hunched over the alchemist with the softest intentions in his heart. 

 

“Did… you just kiss me?” Ed whispered, cheeks flushed and eyes wide. 

 

“Yeah, sorry.” 

 

“Why?” 

 

“Seemed like you needed it.” 

 

Maybe Greed was right. Maybe he  _ did  _ need it. And was that okay? Was it alright to be as selfish as to want to be kissed, to be touched? 

 

Perhaps it was. 

 

“Aaaanyway, Fullmetal, I think I’ve bugged ya enough tonight, I’ll piss off.” The warmth and comforting weight of a body melted away as Greed stood up. Ed could hear him stretching, hear him pop his back and roll his shoulders. “Thanks, by the way. It was kinda grounding to, well, you know, feel a human being. Sorry if I took it a little too far,” His voice was low and genuine, and just barely loud enough for Ed to hear. 

 

“What? Wait you’re just leaving like that?” Ed found himself asking frantically, using practically all of his strength to stand. The kiss had turned his knees to jelly, and he stumbled forward, falling into Greed’s chest. He buried his face into the familiar fabric; it smelled like pine and dirt and petrichor. 

 

“You okay there?” Ed felt Greed wrap an arm around his waist, and the other to rest on his shoulder, hand cupping the back of the alchemist’s head, finger idly curling a loose strand of hair. 

 

“Please don't go.” Was all the shorter boy could muster, entirely flustered and embarrassed about how desperate he must have sounded. “I need you. I don’t want to be alone right now, Greed, please.” He grasped at the soft cotton of the homunculus’ shirt, who, to his surprise, tightened his hold on Ed. 

 

“Yeah.” Was all he said, but it was enough. It was enough to make Ed take a deep breath, to be able to step back. However, he didn’t let go, and neither did Greed. Slowly, Ed tilted his head up, forcing himself to lock eyes with the taller boy. 

 

It was an expression that Greed had never worn before. 

  
  


Eyes thick with concern and affection and flat out  _ love,  _ eyebrows softly drawn together, lips slightly parted as if he were trying to say something, anything at all, but couldn’t find the correct words. Every hint of cockiness or sarcasm or anger was gone. The curves and slopes of his face were illuminated every so slightly by the dying flames, which were casting dancing shadows across his features. 

 

And then, just like that, he tilted his head and leaned down and brought his hand up to the alchemist’s jaw and then lips connected, thrilling and new and familiar and sweet all at the same time. Ed kissed back, pushing some of his weight on Greed, wrapping his arms slowly around his neck. He was hungry for love, and it was evident as he deepened the kiss, screwing his eyes shut and  _ melting  _ into the homunculus’ warm embrace. The world around him faded away, and it was just the two of them, kissing sloppily and shivering in the dark despite the closeness and the fire. 

 

When they finally broke away, they were both breathing heavily, chests rising and falling in unison, hearts pounding fast against both of their ribcages, grinding against the rough bones and throbbing,  _ aching  _ inside of their bodies. 

 

It was like just another kiss, just another dumb teenage act of impulse, but there was something so much more there. Something so much deeper, something so much more intimate than either of them could ever describe, not in a million years. Ed’s body shivered and his lips tingled and his eyes were spilling over with gold, and he grasped at Greed’s coat and he loved that fucking idiot so much that it hurt, it really did hurt, but in the sweetest, most tender of ways. The world, as he knew it, was going to shit, and he had been through hell and back and he had felt pain like no other and he had dealt with loss so vast that any other human being would never be able to comprehend it. Deep in the pit of his stomach, he felt agony so great that it was slowly ripping him apart from the inside out. But right now, none of that mattered. What mattered was that he was safe, right here in Greed’s arms, and he was in love and he was human.

 

“Hold me?” Ed choked out, fighting back tears of relief and fear and sadness and adoration all at once. Greed nodded as he let the alchemist go, slowly crumbling to the ground onto the sleeping back. The minute Ed lay down, he felt a strong arm wrap around his waist and pull him closer, a nose comfortably nuzzling the nook of his neck. 

 

“Are you alright? You look kinda choked up there,” Greed murmured into golden skin, laying a soft kiss on a now loose shoulder. 

 

“I am, stupid as it sounds.” Ed chuckled quietly. 

 

“Why?” The hold tightened, pulling both of them closer to one another. 

 

“I’m just scared, I guess.”

 

“Care to tell me what for?” 

 

Ed thought for a moment. What was he scared of? The Promised Day, yeah, but what else? What was driving him so deeply into the ground, what was weighing on his shoulders like cinderblocks, like a ball and chain? 

 

He took a deep breath, turning so that his face was now resting comfortably under Greed’s neck, arms wrapped around him, holding tight. 

 

“The world is big and we’re not.” 

 

Silence hung in the air for the millionth time that night, but it was once again comfortable and safe and familiar. 

 

Finally, Greed spoke. 

 

“We’re big as gods,” He said firmly, squeezing the alchemist tight to his body. 

 

Both of them huddled up together, as close as possible. Maybe they were scared, maybe cold in the brisk dead of night. Maybe they were just small. Maybe the world was so damn big that it swallowed them whole, maybe maybe maybe. 

 

Ed’s mind lingered on what Greed had said. It didn’t make any sense but did at the same time. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that it was true. There, lying close next to the dying embers, they were the sun and the moon and the mountains and the whole damn sky and nothing else mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> FUCK the government i just wanna write about two assholes with soft hearts and good intentions that sometimes cant help but show their emotions because it's good for them also theyre in love! eat the rich
> 
>  
> 
> hghh trying to make slower paced shit,,,,, im so bad at thissss


End file.
